Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Dear Tonka,

Are you out of your mind? Whose genius idea was it to manufacture this truck.
Now the truck itself isn't so bad. But it makes this unholy noise. What parent is going to let their kid play with this and still keep their sanity. Do you, Tonka, want to be responsible for the unhappiness of kids and parents. Apparently that is exactly what you want inflicting the world with this product. For shame.
I am not above welding a screwdriver to "fix" one of the kids toys. In fact I do it all the time. Do you know what I found in there. A DRUM!!!
The drum is beaten/flicked by the sprocket on the tire axle. (Are you proud of me? I used big technical car terms. Go Me!)
Tonka, I realize this may have been a decision made by one of the lowly engineers in your toy design department. Maybe he/she was having a bad day. Maybe this person doesn't have children. Maybe they had a bad childhood themselves and are just trying to make other people as miserable as they are. No excuse. Some one should have caught this and stopped at some point during production before it got to my Christmas Tree.
You know the worst part. This wasn't even going to be a gift for Mark originally. It was for a kid at my family's Christmas party. That's right. I almost had to walk in there with the toy every parent hates and give to my cousin's kid. Luckily we had a blizzard. So we didn't go. (He probably got a perfectly normal toy.) Do you know what the parents of that kid would have done to me. I wouldn't have made it out alive. You are lucky Tonka. A blizzard saved you from having a murder on your hands. That was a close one.
I will give you one guess to tell me where this is going. Go ahead. Guess.

You can only hope I don't see any of you in a dark alley late at night.
A Mad Mama


dlyn said...

Ha! It was so bad that I even mentioned it on my blog! I am glad the trouble has been rectified.

Flea said...

LOL!!! Put the drum back and give it to that sister-in-law whose kids drive you nuts. Everyone has one of those, right?

Memarie Lane said...

My Uncle Kelly gave Max a huge box full of fire trucks and police cars and such, and every single one of them has a working siren. Every single one. There are about 20.

Nap Warden said...

See now I was the devil when I was a single girl...I used to give my sister's kids the loudest toys I could find. Now that I'm a parent, I would have hated my single self:P

teddie said...

OMG ! If you hadn't confessed to buying this I would have sworn Sean bought it for Mark. You don't know how many times he has said he could not wait to buy your children a drum. Wouldn't it be just like him to hide the drum in a truck!!??